With a little maturity, one can easily absorb an insult, a wrong, or misfortune; but not guilt. When a man, against his will, must endure life’s bitterness, he may initially groan, feel the harm suffered, the loss, the unhappiness; but all of this fades with time when the responsibility falls on an external agent. Suffering, therefore, neither tortures nor takes root. Something very different happens when one knows oneself to be responsible for the harm, especially if it has claimed more than one victim. Here, it is no longer possible to take comfort in accepting something one could not control: the mistake leaves a mark, less by exposing one’s imperfect nature than by establishing one as the author of the unwanted act—forever. One cannot accept it because, unlike in the other case, this act says something about one’s individuality that cannot be suppressed or avoided.
Category: Notes
Disgrace, by J. M. Coetzee
This unsettling narrative is permeated by an indescribable sense of foreboding that never subsides as the story unfolds. There is a palpable sense that something is about to occur, something terrible and shocking, and in the face of this impending danger, one feels an urge to act, to do anything at all, which is repeatedly thwarted. Nothing is done; and so the narrative carries us toward the events, as if defying our desire to avoid them, even though we are, at the same time, eager to know them and put an end to the apprehension once and for all. It is an interesting construction; the author’s style fades into the background before the scenes he describes. Above all, it is a book that leaves no one indifferent and that, perhaps, holds an important lesson.
The Art of Maintaining Good Relationships…
Starting them is not so; but the art of maintaining good relationships is extremely difficult. In truth, although there are obviously different levels, it takes almost nothing for them to develop. A little goodwill, a little courtesy, and they happen. Maintaining them at this healthy level, however, requires wisdom; especially with those that seem most promising, most authentic, and most beneficial. Distance destroys them, and so does closeness. Without balance, vulgarity enters the picture; and then the worst can no longer be avoided. Better to watch them wither away through absence, preserving their memory, than to witness the misery of their deterioration!
The Scandal Is, Above All, Sad
The scandal is, above all, sad. And far more distressing than the events that sparked it is the widespread misery it tends to lay bare. It spreads, spilling beyond its own boundaries; it stirs up and brings to the surface the most despicable aspects of human nature, from repugnant slander to that shameful schadenfreude. Anyone who observes this phenomenon ends up convinced he is living among swine. The frenzied gossip, the presumptuous tone, the demonic pleasure in accusing: all of this provokes a feeling of utter revulsion.